To My Husband, after One Year
It's 4 a.m., and I'm up in a fit of insomnia. I was watching my husband sleep so peacefully and had to come out and type him a little thank you note.
For those of you who don't know me, I'm Robyn. My husband Todd and I were married June 1st, 1996. Todd and I dated off-and-on during the last few years of college, and he proposed the fall after graduation. He never knew me as a "sick" person. I was in remission during the years that we dated. I had briefly mentioned CFIDS/FMS to him -- and that they had caused me to miss out on the majority of high school -- but we never really discussed them.
Two weeks after our wedding, I got sick and just never got better. I got worse. About a month after the wedding I had to quit my job. (Who knows if I'll ever be able to work again. I'm currently applying for Social Security Disability.) I was also diagnosed with NMH (neurally mediated hypotension) shortly after the wedding -- to make things even more interesting, for lack of a better word.
What we've been through in the last year is definately not in the "Newlywed Brochure. But, for those of you that know Todd -- you know what an incredible, supportive, loving man he is. He chooses to face life and its problems with humor rather than bitterness. He never fails to make me smile, and to make me eternally grateful that somehow I deserve his love.
The following really isn't a poem, but just random thoughts that have been floating through my head as we approach our first wedding anniversary this weekend. I thought I'd post it here. Since so much of our relationship, and the effects of these DDs on it, has been made public -- I feel my thank you to him should be made public as well.
Who would have ever dreamed a first year
It just doesn't seem fair sometimes, what
But, despite all of this and more,
I never dreamed marriage could be like
I'm blessed more than I can put into
Happy Anniversary Todd --